What a Godawful day, I’m so happy (read: grateful) it’s over. And that it’s Friday tomorrow.
I had a serious wet-fish anti-smug slap against the head today, when am I ever going to learn?? First up this morning was our meeting with the girls’ teacher. In a nutshell, Mignon is missing her Mommy and she is very emotional at the moment and craving attention. To me this immediately translated to ‘Terrible-you-will-burn-in-hell-Mother’, so I spent the morning thinking over the conversation, trying to work through it. Yes, you can say it, Overanalyse.
Isabel is, well, Isabel. She seems to be the leader at the moment and slots in very well into the rest of the group and is participating and dancing and singing.
Then, after a harrowing morning (trust me, I’ll spare you the details), we had a meeting with Daniel’s teachers. Daniel’s meetings are normally quite boring. We love him, he’s doing great etc etc etc. Today, however was not one of those meetings. (just allow me to say at this point that when my husband reads this he will roll his eyes, but I’m the Mother. OK?) They had some observations about his upper body strength (not great), his posture (needs some work), and he’s just gone through some social changes (in the greater realm of girl friends vs boy friends and development). They even bandied the L word around. You know. L-a-z-y. Oh, the horror.
And for the first time it hit me that he really is his own person. And that Mommy and Daddy doesn’t have control over what he says and does 24/7. And that we can’t always protect him. And that we won’t always know when he is hurting emotionally. And I realised that this has been one of my biggest fears of being a parent: missing that they are going through something and not being there for them. No major gratitude here, maybe I should just be grateful that I care enough to worry, but then I’ll just be smug again, so I’ll just shut up and sip my wine.
Between Hubby and I we kind of fucked something up. Me more than hubby. It’s sorted now, but it caused a lot of stress today. I then remembered a poem that I heard on a video I saw 20 years ago when I was Matric. (Yes, I’m THAT old. And it was the year of Only the Best. You had to be there) The video was that of a motivational speaker called Leo Buscaglia. I was looking for the poem, so I Googled him, hoping I could find it. I couldn’t find the poem, but I did find some of his quotes. He made such an impact on me at that age, I am really grateful for the amazing teacher that shared it with us. That is what separates a normal teacher from a great teacher, the memories and the lessons!