Of parties and gaggles of children and courtesy and grace

How do you like the title of this post?  Confusing enough?

Let me clear it all up.

One of the things I love most about Montessori is “courtesy and grace”, one of their underlying principles.  It’s not just about please and thank you.  It’s also about respect for people, animals and the earth.  Which might sound a bit lala, but bear with me.

As you know we have 3 children.  And those children have class mates, Daniel in his class and the girls in theirs.  Which, because they are all at the same school, means that there are lots of families with siblings in both classes, 1 child families in either class or families with much older or younger children.

All these children have birthdays and most of them have parties.  The kids that have siblings in both classes are fine, usually all my children are invited and we all go along.  The parties I worry about are the parties where the family has child only either in Daniel or Mignon and Isabel’s class.

Before you jump to conclusions, the reason I worry is because I feel bad for that Mom feeling pressurised to invite All My Children, because I want to shout PLEASE don’t invite all of us.  Sometimes it’s nice to just go out with one or 2 of them, you get to spend some time with them.  Ok maybe not so much, because the really good parties have wine, but anyhoo.  And parties are expensive.

Here’s the thing though: sometimes the invites are ambiguous and I so hate to ask ‘Excuse me, but how many of my children did you want me to bring?’  Why? If you have known me for a while you’ll know that tact isn’t really one of my (many) strong points (read: I’m far too straightforward for my own good).  I battle with gracefully asking difficult questions, I feel too awkward and am petrified of coming across as pushy or rude.

So readers, any good advice?  And if you are thinking of inviting only 1 or 2 of my children, that’s completely fine, really!

ps Just to prove how lovely my children are, check what Daniel left for us last night for bedtime reading.  How sweet is this boy?