Thoughts on Grandparents

Isabel keeps knocking the skin off her big toes and in desperation I got some Friar’s Balsam from the chemist today on my Dad’s recommendation.  And the minute I opened the bottle and smelt it, I had the biggest flashback to my Grandfather.

I was lucky enough to have 2 full sets of Grandparents and we used to share the Christmas holidays between my Dad’s parents in Kimberley and my Mom’s parents in on their farm in Campbell, a little town in the Northern Cape. 

They didn’t have power on the farm even late into the 80’s, so at night there was a generator that made a huge noise so the adults could watch the 6pm news.  After that, the generator was switched off and there were gas lamps and candles.  My sister and I used to share a double bed and the room had a very old antique cupboard.  (For some reason I can’t remember where my parents used to sleep, I must remember to ask my Mom.  They were 5 children, so there must have been another room)

Bath time was always interesting, as there was a metal fireplace in the bathroom to heat the water, which was brackish, so the soap used to float on top.

The kitchen had a real Aga and a black ceiling – to this day I cannot figure out why.  There was always a parakeet or 2 that were kept in the kitchen, and my Grandfather used to be so good with them.  Breakfast was always porridge with Cow’s milk, from the actual cow on the farm, with cream on-top and lots of butter (homemade).  The cutlery was also very worn out, the knives all had ivory handles and were very well used.  The dishing up bowls were all enamel, well used.  And lots of flies.

I remember the house as being very dark and in the passage there were scary pictures of my Great-Grandparents.  Stern-looking old people in black and white photographs.  The house had a massive wrap-around stoep and we spent many hours on the stoep just watching life go by and eavesdropping on adult conversations and watching thunder and lightning. 

They also had a big black telephone with a party line, so we had to check if anyone was on the line before we could place a call. 

I remember the smell of the dust, the sound of the gravel when a car pulled up to the house.  The little lambs and goats.  My Grandad’s “office” with “karakul velletjies” all over the place.  And the smell of Friar’s Balsam.  I think he used to use it on the sores on his hands, as I remember being fascinated by his hands.  And his farmer’s hat.  And the way he used to walk, he was a tall man with piercing blue eyes.  He used to paint pictures on pieces of slate, my Mom still has some of the stuff he painted.

My Grandmother had lots of skin flapping under her upper arms (weird what you remember!).  She was English and he was a real Boer.  She had memories of being in Germany in the late 1930’s when she was a child and told to be quiet as “the walls had ears”.

I remember the dams and the windmills, the lucerne growing in the fields, the dry air, the sheep they used to slaughter and the smell thereof.  (to this day I’m not good with raw meat..)

This holiday with my parents brought back so many sweet memories of my own childhood and I often wonder about the memories our children will have of their Grandparents.  I was very lucky to have had these farm holidays, very few children have access to that these days.  I’m just sorry I didn’t eavesdrop on more conversations 🙂