The Pissing Contest

Many people don’t know this about us, but we have a cat.  When we adopted him from the SPCA about 8 years ago he ‘decorated’ our house extensively and we tolerated him until he peed on top of Etienne, through the down duvet.

He promptly got booted out the door and we didn’t see him for about 3 days and we were torn between being really happy to reclaim our house and feeling like we had failed miserably.

He has never been overly friendly or affectionate or chatty.  He just kind of lives in our room and only goes out to do his business.  In the 5.5 years we have lived in this house he has never EVER left the yard.  Really.

The only time he engages with us is when he deigns to let us feed him.  And DO NOT think that you can put food in his bowl and leave it there if he is not around.  If there is ‘old’ food (i.e. it has been there for longer than 10 minutes) he will refuse to eat it and will whine until you give him ‘fresh’ food.  For this reason he gets 3 little cups of food per day.  Although, judging by the way his stomach sways when he trots down the passage you wouldn’t say so.

He sleeps on my side of the bed at night.  Which means that most nights I lie with my legs on Etienne’s side because he is too heavy to move.

Anyhoo.

Of late the peeing has started up again.  Fair enough, it’s mostly on Etienne’s clothes on the floor (Now that was a fun conversation: “Well.  If you pick your clothes up from the floor he won’t pee on it, will he?”).  We think hope this is because he is too cold to go out at night and we are quite frankly sick of leaving a bedroom window open in the middle of the winter, so I invested in a sandbox for him which I installed in out bathroom amid much grumbling from Etienne.

He has ignored this sandbox like a stop street.  I have tried coaxing him into it, dumping him into it and putting his water bowl next to it.  No go.

Last night we found a suspicious-smelling wet spot in the family bathroom (another old favourite spot) and he got the boot.  Etienne eventually let him back in at about 01h00 after Jack (the dog) had chased him around the house about 400 000 times in a failed bid to play.

We saw him briefly this morning and promptly deposited him outside and now he has gone walkies.

I am a little worried.  But we really need to make a plan, I feel like my entire house smells.

Any suggestions on how to train the most change-averse feline creature you have ever come across?

Shame, he is quite a pretty thing too:

Just a pretty face?

 

3 thoughts on “The Pissing Contest”

  1. Oh gosh, no ideas apart from suggesting you buy the odour remover that the Spar’s stock at those carpet cleaning “depo’s” in the shops. And I take it he was fixed? Because that is the first plan always.

  2. Oy, must say I have never heard of something like this before so unfortunately I have no advice. There has GOT to be something that will work though. Good Luck. x

  3. He may need checking out at the vet for any kidney problems, he is getting older and if he is not drinking enough water then they can suffer with kidney issues. I hope it isn’t that, but you can’t be too careful. xx

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