Tag: lovebombing

Lovebombing Episode 2 ish

On Friday night, after careful consideration of bugs and broken arms, we decided to go ahead with our plan.  Daniel went to my parents and Mignon off to Etienne’s folks.

It went really well until 6h30 (pm) when Etienne’s Mom called: Mignon wants to come home, she wants Mommy.  I must confess, I was more than a little flattered, so I zipped over to collect her.  It actually worked out well, Isabel still got to choose who she wanted to read to her (me) and who she wanted to go to the movies with (me).  We left Daniel with my Mom a little later on Saturday and Etienne took Mignon to see a movie as well as next weekend is a little busy, so it worked out well.

Yes, there is a pattern emerging.  My children need more of me, all of them.  And they all need individual, undivided attention, so we need to put our heads together and work within the time we have every day and over weekends to have family time and individual time and couple time and friend time and alone time.

I just have no idea how to divide what little time we have already to give more to our children.

I DO know that they need it, I can see the difference in them immediately.

How do you divvy up your time so that there is enough for everyone?  Do you think it is even possible?

Love Bombing – Episode 1

Friday night was our first Love-bomb Friday in the series of 3 and here are some observations (Daniel was with us, Mignon at my Mom’s house and Isabel with Etienne’s folks):

The Man. On the way to drop his sister off at Granny.
  1. 1 child is A LOT more quiet than 3.  As in, there was an echo in our house.  The silence was awesome and horrifying in equal measure.
  2. That echo was however filled by Daniel’s really bad, open-mouthed chewing.  I’m now wondering if he always eats like this and I just haven’t noticed it?  Are the girls really THAT noisy at night that it masks this horrific sound?
  3. There is also a very real possibility that the kids really just need to spend one-on-one time with me. Daniel wanted me to do most things with him, including going to see Ice Age 4 on Saturday morning.  I love being with him, but I’m not a fan of animation (as in: I would rather stick pens in my eyes) so I was a little surprised when I actually enjoyed the movie.  He was in his element, chewing his popcorn and smarties (eek!) and, wait for it, Crème Soda (triple eek!!)
  4. Children are very quick to take a gap.  I was also dragged into a toy shop in Tygervalley where I was promptly instructed to buy stuff.  This did not end very well, partly for my bank account, but mostly for Daniel.
  5. Don’t for one millisecond think that they will sleep later because they are by themselves.  We thought he would sleep until at least 7h30, so imagine our horror when he reported to our room, wide awake, at 5h40.  We were not amused.
  6. On the topic of sleeping, apparently not much of it was done by Mignon at my Mom’s house as she was awake at 04h45.  Saturday evening was great fun.  NOT.  They were a gaggle of hysterical screamers until they eventually passed out at 8pm.  My ears are still ringing.

BUT

Yesterday morning I heard Daniel being really kind to his sisters when they were getting dressed, like I haven’t heard him in a while and I knew that we had made the right decision to do this.  They already seem a little more content, so let’s see.

This coming Friday Mignon is going to Etienne’s folks, Daniel to my folks and Isabel with us.  I strongly suspect I shall be seeing Brave 2 Saturdays in a row.  All for a good cause!

Then: On Sunday we had some friends over for lunch we haven’t seen in ages and it was a lovely “kuier”.  I wanted something that you could put in the oven and slow-cook so that we could enjoy our friends and not be in the kitchen the whole time.  We (and by “we” I mean “Etienne”) ended up making the most delicious Pork Shoulder Casserole straight off Jane-Anne Hobbs’ blog that was a massive hit.  To say “I love her blog” would be a monumental understatement.  We made our entire Christmas Lunch off her blog about 2 years ago and whenever I want to make something I inevitably find the perfect, idiot-proof recipe on her blog.  She recently published her book and I shall be laying my grubby paws on a copy very soon.  Can’t wait!

A serious stack of pancakes!

For dessert on Sunday I also wanted to do pancakes with decadent sauces, so I found a Caramel Sauce Recipe and a All-American Hot Fudge Sauce to make.  I don’t own a candy thermometer, so the caramel sauce wasn’t perfect, but the Hot Fudge Sauce was sinful. Hint: they were NOT diet-friendly.  A BIG thank you to P and N that made a huge stack of pancakes!

 

Lovebombing 2012 style

I mentioned in this post a few days ago that we were wanting to try something, but we wanted to chat to our kids first to see if they were keen, which we knew they would be, but we wanted to think through and explain our plan properly first.

What am I talking about? Lovebombing.

My awesome friend Tertia did some lovebombing last year and I have been thinking about it on and off since then.

We are in the lucky situation where we still have 2 full sets of parents, although Etienne’s folks are a lot older than my parents (his Dad is 81 and his Mom is of undisclosed age not far off) and we can’t leave too small kids with them as it’s not fair toward them.  My folks are almost 20 years younger and the kids have spent the odd night there.

The weird thing was, when I mentioned my plan Etienne had been thinking along the same lines, so it can’t be too bad.  Right?

So, here’s the plan:

We are going to rotate kids between ourselves and the 2 sets of Grandparents for the next 3 Friday nights.  That way every child will have the undivided attention and love of 2 adults that are close family, 3 Fridays in a row.  The child that is with us can choose what they want to eat for supper, what movie they would like to watch, etc. and will probably end up in bed with us. (who am I kidding, the other 2 will get exactly the same VIP treatment where they are going)

We will then take ‘our’ child to do whatever they want to do on a Saturday morning, be it lying on the couch or going to the movies with us and collect the other 2 from their respective grandparents by lunchtime on Saturday.

The only hiccup I foresee is the girls staying with Etienne’s folks by themselves as they’ve never stayed there overnight and I’m not convinced that they cope well on their own.  (Funny enough Mignon copes better by herself than Isabel does when Isabel appears to be the more dominant twin.)

BUT.

We think that the individual attention is just what they need at the moment and they are very keen for now.

So, this Friday Daniel is first with us, Mignon at my folks and Isabel with Etienne’s folks.  Then, depending on how that goes, we will juggle the next week.

Watch this space…

ps: they were so excited tonight that they have already started packing

pps: the girls have been told that they can’t go to Etienne’s folks if they can’t wipe their own bums.  How’s that for an incentive?